He's behind you

To a village in Lincolnshire for our now seemingly traditional trip to their theatre group's panto. Regular readers may recall that last year's panto was full of inapropriate songs and one of the most un-PC things I've seen on a stage since Bernard Manning was filmed for World in Action.
This year we had primary school children in the chorus thrusting their pelvises enthusiastically to the Timewarp, out of tune singing, a wicked fairy in bondage gear, the only panto dame I've ever seen with tattoos on their forearms and - as this picture shows - a take on The Five Days of Christmas which featured toilet rolls and, er, a bra with three cups. I thought panto was supposed to be a family show..?
The refreshments in the interval were an eye-opener too, in more ways than one as a wild-eyed geriatric surveyed us dunking Gypsy Creams into our teas. I remarked on this, to which my sister replied "That's what you get in Lincolnshire villages - inbreds" Well, she chose to live there.