Me and Eva entered the Hunter trials pairs at Aylesford today. Eighteen fences round a very hilly course. We had a few refusals and were a bit slow so picked up time faults too. We struggled as Jack was faster between fences but then didn't want to lead into them and refused a few when he went first so we just kept getting in each other's way. I was a bit disappointed with how I rode. Buddy refused the milk churn fence again which is the same fence he refused last year even though we have been back and practiced it so many times in between. I think I let it get inside my head and it affected how I rode him. Eva did so well keeping Jack contained as he does get very strong in open spaces and excited when he's jumping so overall a good day but I just felt really disappointed in myself. 

Had a few hours at home to tackle some housework (yuk) then back for a lesson on Indy. Ruth is trying to get me to be more present and connected with him and not rush about so much. I don't think I came to the lesson in the right head space after this morning and also she was an hour late and had already adjusted the time to a later start than usual. I know the time with the horse is yours and their time but real life gets in the way and I have such an enormous amount of things to do all the time it's really hard to just be present and grounded and chilled out!! I know it impacts the horses if I'm not but it's really hard to empty your head! 

Think I'm just having one of those days!!