Premium Perils

I'm a simple soul. I tend to be quite trusting.

If I read that my iPad now has a possible security problem, I'm quite likely to follow the instructions to remedy the security problem (that I didn't create).

So I read that I had to download the newest version of iOS - the version that has been updated to patch the security problem.

So I downloaded it because it would fix the security problem (the one that I didn't create).

And after about 20 minutes of downloading stuff and nice graphics of a wheel turning, I didn't have an internet security problem with my iPad anymore.

Because my iPad switched off altogether and wouldn't restart. Not if you held various buttons down and counted ein und zwanzig until you got to ten. Nothing. It was to all intents and purposes, a dead iPad.

So last resort, connect it to the laptop for the first time and after half an hour, I got the message "Your iPad is broken, you need to fix it".

"By restoring it to factory settings and wiping out all your data and paid for stuff hahahahaha. We're Apple and we're Brilliant. Isn't that a Great Solution to the Problem You didn't cause?"

There are words that are appropriate to use here. Most people know them. If we all join in and sing them, we could be the largest Choir-That-Sounds-Like-It-Has-Tourette's of all time.

To paraphrase a current German film title "Fack Ju Afpel!"