Saying goodbye - beautiful memories

The 24th of July 1998 I wrote in my diary:

"Timo and Joel are out trolling. I can see a tiny boat and Joels' orange life vest far away in the distance on an almost completely calm sea. About half an hour after they left my phone rang. It was Joel calling all excited, that he'd caught about an one kilos pike perch. Joel said that he had been so exhilarated that he'd almost fainted. Finally when they had got the fish in the boat Joel had said that he was feeling dizzy. Timo said that it was so wonderful to see Joel so happy. After all it was the first fish that Joel caught by trolling. At the end we were all very happy."

"On the right side page : Timo is clearing the fishline which was in a tangle. It looked so funny that I was laughing at that act so much that I hardly could stand up."

This happened when we were spending our summer holiday at Joni's grandmotehr's cottage on Torstensholmen in Sipoo. It was on a small island only 30 km from Helsinki.

The left side image is an enlargement of the left page of the spread in the book.

I wanted to start my today's journal with a wonderful memory. That is because yesterday's happiness didn't last very long. Timo is making my life extremely hard here. He is becoming more and more strange, there is nothing left of the man that I married and lived with for 14 years. So now I'm just trying to focus on my own healing and moving on. And moving out.

Saying goodbye is part of my healing process. I want to cherish the beautiful memories and appreciate those 14 years. They were really good. I'm feeling quite happy again.