Man in the Tropics

By manintropics

Day 16

Rule #17 Stuff happens, deal with it!

Well, after yesterday's rather self-satisfied and somewhat apathetic blip, it had to happen - when you let your guard down, it all goes off. So, there we were, just having come back to our hut when I spotted it, on the wall of our bedroom, leering at me, the biggest insect I have ever seen. It was gruesomely, horrendously awful - it had antennae longer than it's body, and it's body was the size of your hand. It was fear-inducing stuff - eeek. So I called to J, as I decided this was her department (since I was going to officially photograph the unfolding events). She was unimpressed with me, but impressed (not in a good way) with the giant insect. We had a short debate/argument and I thought if we put a candle underneath it, it just might move away. So I lit the candle and handed it to J for placement on the shelf below said insect. My theory was an abject failure, the insect seemed to love the heat from the candle and just moved closer. J managed to eventually retrieve the candle, just avoiding knocking it over and setting fire to the place and we made a tactical withdrawal to consider options. We considered taking down the net curtains and trying to use it as a net - J didn't fancy trying that. I suggested she use my diving knife to stab it - she didn't fancy that either. So we turned to the old standby, the insect spray. J again rejected my suggestion to put a match to the spray to make a flamethrower, so it was just plain old spray. Using towels as protection for herself, J attacked the giant bug with the spray. It was horrendous, the thing just would not die, it seemed to become more aggressive and jumpy. But eventually, after what seemed like years, the thing died, and J flicked the carcass over the balcony. What a star she is, that's why I married her. The photos were taken yesterday which is why one doesn't appear on today's blip. So the insect tally is J = 3, me = 0. Apparently the next insect is definitely mine to deal with - oh dear. Anyway, it was hard to sleep with thoughts of that disgusting creature etched in our minds - we both showed symptoms of post traumatic stress!

And then, last night, a storm hit - thunder, lightening, torrential rain. And these buildings are not sufficiently waterproof, so we got rained on. And then a coconut fell out of a tree onto the roof. J thought it was another giant insect attacking the mosquito net - she flipped. so, not a very restful night.

As if this was not enough, this morning I realised I had lost my wedding ring. Oops! It is only the 5th wedding ring I have lost - a bit careless (I'm told!). By examining photos we reckon it came off yesterday when swimming. Not that there are many photos of me - apparently I look grumpy in photos so j doesn't want to take any of me - I'm not grumpy, just concerned that J will damage my camera! Anyway, the loss of my ring has led to 3 options being considered - 1. Get a new, tighter ring. I am not in favour of this at all. 2. Have no ring (J's view!). I'm not in favour of that either as I am proud to be a married man. That seems to leave only option 3, which I think I will go with - to get a tattoo of a ring put on - problem solved!

The photo today is evidence of my ringlessness

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