Dadhandled

Dad-han-dle
verb
- to move (a heavy or stubborn object) with immense effort and threat of personal injury by paternal power: Euan had to be dadhandled into donning his rubber gloves and picking up the Mr Muscle bathroom spray for his chores today.

Should probably have done some warm up exercises before attempting this manoeuvre today but he'd pushed all my buttons by this point and deserved it. It was a walk to the local barbers for both of us this morning, which Euan had again interpreted as a march along the green mile to the electric chair, and during which he trailed behind and whinged constantly about being hungry and asking why we just couldn't let out hair grow forever (to which, to be fair to his logic, I had no valid reason other than his mum had said). He seemed much happier on the walk back, most likely down to the square sausage on a roll I'd had to buy to shut him up about the hunger thing, but he started off again as soon as he got home and was asked to do a bit of housework to help out. After half an hour of his interpretive housework routine (which involved shuffling objects around a bit and threatening the bathroom furniture with a glimpse of a cloth) I cracked and he got it.

Don't think I'll be able to do this much more though, and the day's coming soon in which it'll be me dangling upside down here but it did the trick and the house is now all spick and span.

Enjoy your Saturday evening all.

PS: No twelve year olds were harmed in making this blip. At least, nothing that can be proven as all those bruises were already there.

PPS: Thanks to Heather for grabbing the camera and capturing this today. I'll send you a nice letter from jail when the child protection people get hold of them. xx

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