Cheeeeese!

Tough choice on shot tonight. T'was this smiley puffball, or the obligatory cat shot: Pounce. Mind you, it would have been academic but for a missed opportunity.

I've done this before, but...

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Dear Dettol

Having watched your most recent advert for a soap dispenser that automatically dispenses the anti-bacterial contents so that you do not have to touch the actual dispenser and therefore run the risk of contracting some nasty disease or other, I was wondering if you might help me source the automatic taps that also feature in your advert.

I only ask because I note in the advert that in all three instances of the automatic dispenser being used the water is already running from the tap, or we never see the dispenser-using family member touch the tap. And clearly, in order to retain the anti-bacterial properties of of the no-touch dispenser, it would make an absolute mockery of the no-touch process if you then had to touch the tap to turn it on and off.

I agree that the world would be a much safer place if we never had to touch anything ever again. Some may call it fear-mongering for cynical commercial gain, but I can see that you merely wish the world to be a better place. You will be pleased to learn that I handled this envelope with medically sterilised gloves, and sealed the envelope with collected spit which has been subjected to rigourous cleaning by straining it through the hair of virgins into a jar sterilised with the breath of a new-born babe. My paper was blessed by a Priest and, just to make sure, also an Imam, a Rabbi, the Dalai Lama, and Richard Hammond. Oh, and the ink in my printer cartridge was extracted from a juvenile octopus kept alive in a vat of bleach. You never can be too sure.

Sadly I cannot vouch for the cleanliness of the postman's hands. Which does sort of negate all of the precautions taken. A bit like having to turn a tap off after using your dispenser.

Regards