Swimming Against The Tide

By ViolaMaths

Sweet Kepler!

This is Kepler. He came to me sort of by accident. I fetched him for someone who was then intending to rehome him. So he was rehomed to me before he even got to anyone else!

Very sweet boy.

This was the photo I took on my phone, which has saved my blip continuity (see 28 June entry).

Today we got up late (we weren't yet up when I took this, I was just saying good morning to Kepler while the Wonderspouse was fetching the tea and feeding the cats).

In the afternoon I went over to Scharwenka's, and Scharwenka accompanied me on the afternoon's missions:
1. To take three little rat men to their new human.
2. To collect my CELTA coursework from college.
3. To go supermarket shopping for food.

I kept myself going and succeeded at all three. However, I was exhausted when I got home.

The Wonderspouse spoke to FiL at length in the morning (FiL had been trying to get hold of him in order to check that he was OK with the hospital doing a post-mortem on Mil (they'd like to check and see whether there was anything that the scans they did on her couldn't pick up, and to try to explain some of the symptoms she had that were never really fully explained)). The Wonderspouse was fine with it - anything that might help others.

Another odd day, where everything is slightly out of normal focus, yet the rest of the world get on as though nothing has happened, which feels strange.

I know a lot of these feelings from when I've been severely depressed and ill. What's different is that I know that at the moment I'm not ill, but that this is the normal version of what bipolar disorder causes abnormally. The Wonderspouse is feeling similar, except with him it's manifested more as anxiety.

Very odd. Very strange times. Still love you MiL, even though I can't tell you any more. Still ever so grateful to her for making (with FiL's help, of course), the Wonderspouse.

And thanks for modelling for the photo little Kepler!

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