Desperately seeking

By clickychick

Mr & Mrs Saltandpepper

Mr & Mrs Saltandpepper were excited. They were going on a journey. They were leaving their cosy place in the kitchen and travelling through the hall. Mrs Homeowner placed them in the centre of the dining table where they had a fine view of everything going on.

"Gosh! Is she having a party?" Mr Saltandpepper asked.

"No!" Mrs Saltandpepper replied, "she wouldn't have a party while Mr Homeowner's away. Beside's which, I can only see one guest and she hasn't got out the best tablecloth!"

Shortly afterwards, Mrs Homeowner and Mr Guest sat down at the table, things were getting exciting. Mr & Mrs Saltandpepper might be asked to do their clever trick when, held around their waists, they deliver servings of condiments.

Well! What a shock Mrs Saltandpepper got! After she had kindly deposited salt on Mr Guest's meal, he tipped her up and looked at her bottom Oh! How rude! Then Mr Guest said her hole had got too big and she was worn out! 

Mrs Saltandpepper was in a state of shock. "This wouldn't have been allowed to happen if Mr Homeowner had been here. Mr Guest would have got a good telling of for this!" declared Mr Saltandpepper.

"Mrs Homeowner is saying how much she likes me and how long she's had me. She's never complained about my bottom!

What's she talking about? What's a Christmas wish list?"

"Where's Mr Homeowner? He needs to intervene!"

The unhappy couple were returned to their place in the kitchen, but not before a trip to the home studio for a moment of fame under the spotlights.

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