Lala's Journal

By Lala

Another ‘significant date’

On this day last year we got B’s diagnosis. I don’t know if I’d remember it so easily if it wasn’t the day after our anniversary, but the two will be entwined together forever in my memory. 

I did yesterday pretty well I thought, and even wrote a whole KS2 Kings and Queens activity book. Today, the word I’d use is ‘tense’. On edge. Not helped with the boiler diagnosis of ‘it’s on its way out, you need a new one’! I can’t help trying to work out would B would say, and the truth is I don’t know. I know what he’d say if he was here, he was a heating engineer in his early working life, but he’s not here, and I don’t have his knowledge and understanding.

I did try to settle to work, and have answered all emails and queries, but not much else. My brain just wouldn’t settle and I have been fidgety all day. Anne, intuitively messaged around 3pm and said she was aiming for Costa if I fancied a coffee. So that killed an hour. 

Regular readers may remember the lady I met last year, whose husband was being discharged from hospital for palliative care only. She was looking for an over the bed table, quick! I messaged her and gave her the one I’d bought for B. Her husband rallied with steroids and we message every few weeks. This evening she wrote that he had passed on Tuesday. 
She knew I didn’t want the table back and is going to sell it and donate the money to cancer research. That table did well! We will meet up in a couple of weeks with a bottle! 

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