occhi verdi

By occhiverdi

Theodore Joseph Caffarel

I realized tonight as I was on the phone recapping the service that this was the first death of someone extremely close to me. I was 12 when my granddaddy died (October 13, 1995). I was 21 when Parker died (June 2, 2004). I did not attend either funeral and have always wished I could have been at both. I've never seen where my granddaddy or Parker was buried.. never visited either grave. That may be why I do not fully understand the connection that people feel when they go to visit the grave of a loved one. I feel like I would like to visit Ted's resting place when they finally give him back to us.
I was closer to Ted than either of those two. He was a part of my family.. not necessarily the family that I was born into; but the family that is brought together out of love. Ted loved my dad like a brother and my dad loved him more than any other friend he's ever had.
I read Romans 6:3-9 today from Ted's Bible during the service. I saw the notes he had written in the margins. Nuria will keep his Bible. I told her tonight that I will be her Godmother until she is ready to be mine.
I feel so honored to have been included in Ted's service. I feel like I was able to pour back just a tiny fraction of the love he bestowed on me while he was alive. My dad gave his own testimony to Ted's life and the impact that his friendship had on his life and our family's life. I've never seen my dad shed more than a single tear in my entire life. Yet, he had tears streaming down his face today and choked up on his words while he was speaking about how much love he has for this great man, Ted Caffarel.
I really don't even think words can do him justice. It's like my oldest brother David said, (and I paraphrase because I didn't get David's email and I'm trying to remember what my dad said earlier today during the service) He never knew a man like Ted and he will spend the rest of his days striving to be even half the man that Ted IS.
Ted, I could have used your scalp massages this weekend. I've had killer migraines. I can remember you massaging my neck since I was a little girl. You've been there for as long as I can remember, right by my dad's side. You were a true best friend to my dad. I can't imagine him having a better witness to God's love than you. You taught me that it was okay to love my dad even when I felt like the world was crashing in around me.
I can't thank you enough for that. I feel like I mentioned it at least once to you... Dad remembers me saying it. I've told Nuria already, but I'd never seen Ted happier than when he was with her. And they enjoyed life together.. in Barcelona, in Roatan, Honduras, in Colorado, in Louisiana, in Beaumont, all around Texas. Ted and Nuria loved each other and loved the friends they were with. "Ted's Nuria" and "Nuria's Ted".
I already feel blessed by the friendships that Nuria has brought into my parents' lives. My prayer going forward is that my dad reach out to these people whom Ted loved and they hold onto each other during and after these times of loneliness.
My dad needs a friend to get him through this. I've tried to be his friend in the past, but I think it's just different seeing as how I'm his daughter.
I hope I can stop crying when I think about Ted. I know that isn't going to be anytime soon. So I apologize in advance.. I promise I'm not always so sad.
I'm a better person for having had you in my life as a second father figure, Ted. Thank you for sharing your life with us.

The full Shadowbox my dad made for Ted.

Or do you not know that all of us who have been baptized into Christ Jesus have been baptized into His death?

Therefore we have been buried with Him through baptism into death, so that as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, so we too might walk in newness of life.

For if we have become united with Him in the likeness of His death, certainly we shall also be in the likeness of His resurrection,

knowing this, that our old self was crucified with Him, in order that our body of sin might be done away with, so that we would no longer be slaves to sin;

for he who has died is freed from sin.

Now if we have died with Christ, we believe that we shall also live with Him,

knowing that Christ, having been raised from the dead, is never to die again; death no longer is master over Him.

I really can't thank you all enough for the prayers for my family.. both on blip and on facebook - all of you that are reading. Thank you for the kind thoughts, condolences, prayers, and love. Love is the greatest action of all. May you love well all the days of your life.

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